Christmas was not what I expected. Timmy was off being Timmy, doing what Timmy does...
I basically hung out with his family, which was great, but my boyfriend was noticably absent by everyone. I was rather perturbed. We left a on a negative note. We did not talk the next day. It's weird when we do this. Mere hours feel stretched into eons, both us us with our finger on the phone ready to hit dial.
I saw him downtown that late after noon (already dark). It was a heart pounding eerie feeling seeing him walk by with his stupid big umbrella and backpack knowing damn well he knew he was close to me, but not talking to me (I saw him, he did not see me). Anyway, after I picked up Abby I stopped by the family house because I forget the camera. Timmy's mom seemed happy. She offered me to take the cake I baked to celebrate Tim's birthday (pictured above). I left it saying he/they should have it (cake never got ate. It;s probably still on the counter). She invited Abby and I to stay (open invite) as Ollie and Steel were there (brother's kids), but as I had not talked to Timmy all day and I was in this "I know he's mad at me when he should not be when he's in the wrong" stage, so I left.
A few hours later he calls me but I missed the call and I had a voicemail. I figured it would just be a click of hanging up. It was not. He says he's hurt and the house is burning....I threw my stuff on, dropped off Abby to dad's and spent the next week in the hospital and with his now displaced family, who literally walked out the door without shoes and coats.
The Do Not Cross Fire Line got stuck on my car and was transported to the hospital.
I have debated for weeks even what to say or write about this. Should I post pictures? I can't just
not put this in my journal. It's impacted everyone, including Abby. In the fire Tim's cat died. Abby looked at me randomly the other day and said "Poor Dave".
I am posting ONE picture of the aftermath.These are on Thanksgiving.
This is what is left. The clock has stopped at 8:20pm.
I could not post the photo of what this area looks like now. This hallway had some special memories for us. The hallway is
gone.
Life has changed dramatically and been topsy turvy, with highs and lows. I can't help thinking that if I would have stayed, it would not have happened, which is true. It might have happened later, during the middle of the night and people could have been hurt. It might not have happened at all. I do know that nothing short of this destruction would have changed Timmy's path. I wish we could have had more time together as he was, prior to this. He was thrilling. I also have learned who friends are. Ironically, look who has been so supportive!
